Paul's Progress, Keeping My Sanity

Original post January 22, 2013

I left for vacation 9 days ago, thinking that Paul's situation had changed, and it had. He was moved from Good Samaritan Hospital to Drake Rehabilitation hospital for brain injured patients. 

During my time away I received a phone call from the intake nurse at Drake who assured me that goals have been set and Paul would be well taken care of. That was last Monday. 

By Thursday I received two more calls. One was from the Speech Pathologist at Drake who had difficulty getting records from Good Sam. This must be common for records to not go with patients, so Paul sat for nearly a week without proper care because there were no records. The other call was from Paul's trusted friend Tom who has handled Paul's finances for him forever. While everyone at Paul's old assisted living facility knows Tom, for some reason they would not release Paul's mail to Tom so his bills could be paid. 

Today, we met with the staff involved with Paul's care at Drake. There's physical therapy, occupational therapy and speech therapy. Oh, and one more thing, a feeding tube inserted directly into his stomach - which turns mine every time I think of it. His mouth is crusted over, and he has sponges that are attached to a lollipop stick to try to keep his mouth moist. But those only come when the aids remember to bring them.

I keep feeling that my brother, at sixty, is too young for all this. I keep thinking that at fifty-five I'm too young to face this. But then I think of my own mother, who never gave up on him, even when doctors did. Grant it, I don't have the same mother's devotion to Paul, but I am compassionate toward him and his circumstance. 

So our next adventure is to find an appropriate skilled-care facility for Paul. Not for him to be locked away, but for him to hopefully regain his ability to eat solid foods. Otherwise, someone will need to care for a feeding tube, make sure the bagged nutrition is administered, the site of the tube cleaned, flushed and checked for infection. 

It is all a lesson in the balance of making decisions with and for someone who has brain damage.